To update my blog with the birth of my son is to acknowledge everything that also happened that day. This has been very hard for me hence the long delay in the update.
My beautiful sister Stephanie was going through a tremendously rough period, and I think we all realized in the days earlier that she might not make it after all. This was such a shock because we never once conceived that she wouldn't pull through and be okay. After several conversations with my mom and sister Carrie I realized that I needed to have Lucas a few days earlier in order to get back to Illinois. I knew the day that I went in to deliver Lucas that Stephanie probably wouldn't make it through the day. Nothing can be harder, to know that you are going to give a child life, while your sibling may be loosing hers.
Stephanie lost her battle with cancer at 4:45 on Monday July 19th. Lucas was born into this world at 5:15. Everyone has their own version of what they think happened that day, but I like this one best.
Stephanie left this world long enough to hold Lucas in her arms. She told him all about the world he was coming into, and the family that would love him. She told him to be a good cousin, grandson, great grandson, nephew, and son. She also probably told him to give me hell. By getting the opportunity to hold him she passed a small trait onto him. Nothing he couldn't get over, but something to let us know that she got her time with him. Stephanie was having a hard time breathing due to the cancer. When Lucas was born I heard the nurses tell Jarrod that his chest shouldn't be doing that. They let me see him for a brief moment and explained to me that he was breathing quite right. It's normal for a c section baby to have extra fluid, Lucas had this extra fluid and swallowed it. The nurses took him to the NICU to treat and monitor him.
The next time I saw Lucas was after I was released from recovery. I had spoken with Carrie by this point and knew that we had lost Stephanie. My heart was hurting and I really needed to see Lucas and know that he was all right. The nurse wheeled my bed into the NICU and I saw my precious son laying there with his oxygen "tank" on his head. It was then that I knew Stephanie had been with him. In the next couple of days Lucas recuperated and was finally able to join me in my room. After spending a day at home we drove to Illinois to lay Stephanie to rest. I know she was watching over us and giving us all the strength to make it through. While I will mourn the loss of my sister forever, I will try to never again acknowledge the events of that day, other than to say that I was truly blessed. July 19th is Lucas' birthday. It will be nothing but a happy day for me, a day to remember life's blessings and know we all all have an Angel looking down on us.
